Running in the moment
In the past year and a half, I've had many thoughts about not wanting to do another marathon.
With the exception of the time I was running at Disney in January 2013, I've had no excitement about doing this distance since training ended in fall 2012.
Now that I have climbed my way out of a funk, I understand more and more than my funk lasted for so long because I felt like I should be training for a marathon, or maybe even beyond.
All other runs didn't seem as important without having a goal for 26.2 miles in mind. I got too caught up in other people's emotions and what it was like for them to hit goals for that distance.
I had a hidden secret that I was going to do the Blue Ridge Marathon this year; the reality is just before Shamrock I knew Blue Ridge wouldn't be able to happen. After realizing what I need to do just to perform better at a half, I opted to move along from cramming in more miles and instead focus on another half ... and then eventually knocking out a PR in the half and/or other distances.
While doing several quarter-mile intervals this morning, I realized even more that I'm just not excited about training for a marathon. I'm excited, though, about running faster. Out of nowhere, one of my intervals was in 1:47; they were all under 1:54.
When looking back at 10 years of running, the times I remember the most have been when I've gone for a PR at shorter distances.
Conquering the marathon distance for the first time in 2007 was definitely thrilling; breaking 4 hours in 2011 after an injury was amazing; doing Disney was quite magical; but my overall feeling toward long runs of 2-3 hours and 40-some mile weeks in the middle of summer (or winter) is not a positive one.
My last PR was in a 10K in May 2012, which came at the end of an awesome year-plus span of running. I know that I haven't peaked yet.
It's very possible that I take another 3-year break from the marathon like I did after 2007; the bug may bite me sooner; it may never bite again.
It feels so out of the ordinary and crazy to improve my 5K time and try to get it closer to 21 minutes; I need to find a 10K or two and go for 45 minutes; and, of course, I'd love to read 1:39:59 on a half marathon clock within the next year.
It's time for me to live in the moment and go for other things with running that, at least right now, are more exciting and feel right. Now I just have to figure out what to go for first.